The Vibrational Frequency of Friendship – When A Friend Is No Longer On the Same Wavelength

You’ve heard the expression “we’re just not on the same wavelength,” meaning that we just don’t view, feel or believe things in a similar way.  Are there people in your life that you just don’t feel are on a similar vibrational frequency as you? Do you question why they are still in your life?  Do you wonder about perhaps moving on and away from them? (I mean figuratively not literally!)

Sometimes relationships seem to “wear out” as people grow and change. We are constantly evolving in our emotional and spiritual attitudes and beliefs. People come and go in our lives — sometimes it just happens and sometimes we consciously get involved in the process.

We’re told by the experts in personal development that we should surround ourselves by people who will by in sync with our aspirations and our energy. How does it make us feel and how does it impact our life when some of our friends don’t feel like a fit for us anymore?

Maybe we truly care about them — but they just don’t resonate with our current life path. Sometimes they clearly have severe negative energy.  Sometimes they get on our case about what we’re up to — they don’t agree with what we are doing. They make it known very forcefully that they don’t approve.

Take an honest look at a relationship like this. Did the relationship change because YOU changed?  Or did it change because the other person changed? If they’ve become crankier and more negative over time — then perhaps they have not lived up to their part of the “friendship contract.” I consider that the unwritten, but implied, agreement that you will support each other over time, understand and respect each other. You will also be a kind of positive cheerleader — routing for each other. But when the other person clearly does not live up to this part of the deal, then you are bound to be disappointed, disillusioned and perhaps almost ready to be done with this person… but not quite.

The most essential thing is to continue to move along on your own journey  with certainty and self-assurance.  Don’t let yourself be brought down.  Create what I’ve heard termed a “vibrational buffer zone” around yourself. Keep your goals strong and your energy high, and continue to move forward in your plans, your life, your ideals.  Don’t let the influence of “naysayers” disrupt your own flow of positive emotion.

How is it best to relate to these people?  Of course, some obviously negative and dysfunctional friendships may need to be completely released. But what about someone in that “gray area?” Make a conscious effort to see that person in their best light. Remember what you first noticed about their personality that drew you to them. If they took the first step toward you, you must have felt appreciated and validated.  Look for the good within that person. What has kept this friendship alive this far? Give this some focused thought.

Above all, keep that person’s light of goodness shining in your heart. See them as you want them to be — in an inspired and radiant way. It is certainly possible that they can once again be the kind of friend that you admire and enjoy. I don’t mean to completely delude yourself.  If someone is really making you uncomfortable, then back away.

I think the bottom line is: do you care about them deeply enough? Do they still add joy, harmony and pleasure to your life on some level? If the balance is still in the favor of you enjoying the friendship, even a little, then definitely make an effort to work with the relationship. It may help to let them know — gently — that you expect more from them (more respect, more enlightenment, etc). Keep your heart and mind open — and find clever ways to stay connected on a level that will work for both you.

Here are your affirmations:

• I am surrounded by people who are kind, respectful, and enthusiastically support my goals.
• My close friends bring so much joy into my life experience.
• I choose to spend time with people who resonate with my own positive energy and uplift me!